Let’s first begin by saying, a couple who never fights or never passionately disagrees is not likely to be a truly happy or healthy couple. On the flipside, constant fighting does not lead to a happy or healthy relationship either. Below are just a handful of reasons why women pick occasional fights with the men they love, or why your relationship may be going through a bit of a rough patch where you are fighting more frequently than usual.
Because We Have Been Keeping Something Bottled Up
If your wife or girlfriend is upset with you over a seemingly minor infraction, it may have simply been the straw that broke the camel’s back. After things calm down again, inquire if there is something else that has been bothering her. However, it is likely that she will refer to what else is on her mind during your fight—so make sure you are listening.
Because We Are Pushing Our Boundaries
Whether it is conscious or subconscious, sometimes we fight with the man we love simply to see how far we can go. This is a tricky one, because a man who gives in each and every time ends up becoming a pushover. A man who never gives in is often too inflexible for either of you to achieve true happiness. This means that there needs to be a sense of balance and compromise, so you must not give in every time.
Because Our Heart Is In The Right Place
Sometimes women pick a fight with our lover, because our heart is in the right place. Maybe we see you repeating the same mistake one too many times, or maybe we see that you are currently making a poor decision. In some cases we may have even tried to talk things through reasonably, but don’t seem to be getting through, so we pick a fight.
Because You Are Not Giving Us What We Need
If communication in the relationship is not there, we may have to resort to fighting as a way to share what we need. This could be because we have tried to talk and you keep putting us off, or because we ourselves are uncomfortable having difficult conversations.
Because We Are Self-Sabotaging Ourselves
As counterintuitive as this one may sound, sometimes we pick a fight with you because we are self-sabotaging ourselves. Maybe we have never been in a relationship that is so happy or healthy, or have never been so in love. Maybe we are sure we are going to mess things up at some point, down the road—so why not pick a fight today? If you feel self-sabotage is to blame, be patient with us as we work through our insecurities.
Also keep in mind that the things we fight about, or just disagree about, in the beginning of a relationship, are likely to be the things we will continue to fight about over the years. This means that you must determine if those topics are ones you can learn to live with—even if you never see eye to eye.